The Real Housewives of NYC Recap

LuAnn, Bethenny, Alex

The three ladies all met up at a Habitat for Humanity event and got right to discussing how awkward Ramon was at the dinner party when she just upped and left. LuAnn asked Simon if he knew it was going to be all girls at the party and he said no, which Bethenny quickly called him on. Alex said that Bethenny could have said no to Simon coming (she's getting defensive), so then LuAnn asks Alex why she wanted to bring her husband to a girls night in the first place. Alex said she'll come clean and explains that she doesn't like girls nights and guys nights because it's gender inequality. This, obviously, makes Bethenny (and us!) roll her eyes.

Alex then asks, "Why can't you talk about vibrators in mixed company?" which she follows with "Plug it in. What's the problem?" and Bethenny says in her interview, "Why are you plugging it in? What era are you in?" Hands down, this was the funniest Real Housewives moment yet. Thank you, Bethenny!

Jill

Jill said it's really important for her daughter Allyson to have an internship... so she has her intern at Jill and Bobby's company. Real hard internship.

I'd be embarrassed if I were Allyson - she can barely even just answer the phone. Of course, it doesn't help when your mom and her "gay husband" are calling you constantly and fake ordering Chinese takeout. Plus, it shows just how seriously Jill takes her daughter's internship.

Alex

Simon's step father died and Simon has to leave for Australia for 9 days. Of course this will be very hard on Alex, to be away from her husband for so long, but, Alex said she'll be okay because her au pair will be there. My favorite part is that Alex is making it seem like it's the end of the world.

Jill

Jill is throwing a dinner holiday party and she and Bethenny decide to invite Ramona. Part of it is that they think it'll be a do-over from the other dinner party, and part of it is that Bethenny thinks maybe Ramona has changed.

Bethenny

I love this episode because Bethenny has just stopped holding back. At the racetrack she receives a birthday gift from her father's friend. Nice, right? Not so much - the gift turns out to be a black negligee. In front of the man she says how nice it is, but as soon as she's in her interview, she says "Holy inappropriate! What the f-?"

Ramona

Ramona talks about how she doesn't go under the knife to look young; she just uses special creams. Then she talks about going to the dinner party and how the other housewives are not true friends if they can't forgive her. Blah blah blah.

Bethenny

You know something's going to go wrong at dinner because Bethenny builds up how excited she is for her birthday dinner. Jill keeps talking about "stuff" and Bethenny can't handle it. So naturally she tells Jill if she talks about any more material things, she'll take her skewer and shove it in Jill's eyeball. Well if anything was going to ruin the mood, that was it.

LuAnn

LuAnn got some bonus points as she volunteered at a charity where she helps homeless people get jobs. She did a great job at helping a woman improve her interviewing skills. It was really nice.

Alex

Alex's son Francois was really funny during his school evaluation. The man doing the exam pointed to a piece of paper and asked Francois what color it was. Francois correctly answered red and said, "I can do something harder." Then later on he said, "I'm too smart for you." What a character!

Bethenny and Jill

Bethenny and Jill are over their little restaurant tiff and Jill agrees to go with Bethenny to look at apartments. Bethenny says that once she and Jason move in, they are one step closer to getting married. While they're looking at apartments, some of them are under construction so the two ladies have to wear hard hats. As Bethenny said to Jill, "Cher called. She wants her outfit back." Jill went on and on about every detail of the apartments, and Bethenny did a fantastic job of imitating her.

Ramona

And the dinner party is here. All the housewives are invited, along with their children. So far, all of the housewives and their families have arrived, except for Jason and Ramona. Jason is supposed to arrive once he's put his kids to bed, and Ramona, well, we'll find out where she is. Everyone is getting incredibly feisty. The ladies were waiting over an hour for Ramona, and once she arrives, Jill let's her know that everyone is upset with Ramona's tardiness.

Ramona hugs Simon and tells him how debonair he looks. Then she tells him how she's a stickler for time and she really wanted to look "glam" for the night, so she even hired a makeup artist for the event. Oy.

The Children

All the housewives' kids sit together at the kids' table. You know they must love it. (Kidding!) Considering they aren't really friends, the conversation is very awkward. They uncomfortably compliment each mom's outfit.

Ramona

Yes, it's Ramona again. As the rest of the ladies ask Alex and Simon how their 9 days apart went, Ramona asks if Alex was allowed to have a girls night while Simon was gone. Or did she have to get a permission slip from him? C'mon Ramona. Did you learn nothing from the last dinner party? As Bethenny said, "Leave the woman alone."

Why didn't the other women tell Ramona to shut up!?!

Ramona and The Children

Suddenly Francois goes crazy (he must have been bored), and starts running around the table screaming. Ramona completely freaked out, asking him if he knows he's at a nice dinner party (isn't he like 3 years old?) and saying that her daughter would never do that. Poor guy is just trying to have a little fun.

The Husbands/Boyfriends

Simon asks Mario (Ramona's husband) if he heard how he met Ramona. Mario immediately asks if Ramona was nasty, since he knows how she can be. (Why is he still with her?)

Jason finally arrives at dinner and is starving, so Bethenny had ordered him a burger from the 21 club, costing $30. Just as Jason starts to eat it, Francois comes over and starts attacking the burger with a plastic kangaroo toy. I agree with Bethenny - Alex and Simon talk their kids up constantly, and yet they haven't really reared them well. As Bethenny said, Alex brags that Francois can translate "Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star" into French, but yet Francois doesn't know not to stab a burger. "What's more useful in life?" Agreed.

The End

The show ends and we find out that LuAnn is writing a book on manners & etiquette, Francois will be attending kindergarten at "one of the best public schools in Brooklyn," Ramona has started a skin care line, Avery put acting on hold (woohoo!), Bethenny landed a multi-book deal and Jason finally asked her to move in (though she's waiting until they're engaged) and Jill visited an orphanage.

Until the reunion and next season...

 

Like this? Want more?
preview
Connect with Us
Follow Our Pins

Yummy recipes, DIY projects, home decor, fashion and more curated by iVillage staffers.

Follow Our Tweets

The very dirty truth about fashion internships... DUN DUN @srslytheshow http://t.co/wfewf

On Instagram

Behind-the-scenes pics from iVillage.

Best of the Web