Many
can be managed when you understand
what is causing them. Effective management requires a high level of comfort
between you and your doctor, possibly along with your partner.
Because a sexual problem often has multiple causes, treatments cannot be
universally applied—what works for one woman may not work for another. An
effective plan will address and manage the cause. And if you have a partner, your plan will also include ways to build and strengthen
intimate communication between you and your partner. The best results will help
you find methods of having a satisfying sexual life.
Treatment may
include:
- Medical treatment for any cause.
- Education about your body, your sexual signals and
receptors, and changes in sexuality as you get older.
- Communication counseling for you and your
partner.
- Psychological therapy. Therapy for sexual problems often involves .
- Sex therapy.
Treatment for decrease of sexual desire
A
decrease in your level of desire might be expressed by fewer sexual thoughts
and/or a reluctance to engage in sexual activity. Treatment for physical causes
can include:
- Changing from a
medicine that has been curbing your interest in sex.
- Relieving pain, illness, or sleep problems that are curbing your
interest in sex.
- Hormone therapy with
estrogen. After menopause, low levels of estrogen in
the body cause vaginal dryness. This can be painful during sex. Estrogen
reverses this.
- Testosterone. Normally, a woman's
testosterone slowly declines with age. It drops suddenly when a woman has
surgery to remove the ovaries (oophorectomy, causing surgical
). Testosterone is sometimes
used after natural or surgical menopause to improve sex drive. When taken in
too high a dose, testosterone causes male-type side effects, such as a
deepening voice, thinning scalp hair, and growth of facial and body hair.
Testosterone risks are not fully researched.
- Exercise, to improve
your mood and increase natural testosterone levels.
Your doctor can treat physical or hormonal causes, and
you can work on other facets of sexual desire. For example:
- Changing your setting and routine can improve
your time together. Do you have enough privacy and time? Are you interested in
trying something new?
- Having a partner you feel comfortable and
nonstressed with plays a big part in your desire level.
- Getting
counseling as a couple can help strengthen your emotional connection with your
partner. Improving a stressed relationship is likely to improve your sexual
relationship.
It is normal to lack desire for a partner who forces
sex or is verbally abusive or physically violent. For more information, see the
topic
Domestic Violence.
Treatment for decrease of sexual arousal
A
decrease in the level of arousal might be noticed as an inability to feel or
maintain sexual excitement. A woman's sexual arousal often is enhanced by, and
is sometimes dependent on, stimulation in areas other than the genital area,
especially the breasts. Treatment for a decrease in your sexual arousal may
include:
- Increasing the level of intimacy and sexual
arousal with your partner before penetration.
- Liberal use of
vaginal lubricants.
- Masturbation, possibly with the aid of a
vibrator and/or with your partner.
- Education about the role that emotions play in sexual
arousal.
- Counseling, to help adjust expectations of sexual
activity. If too much pressure is put on partners to perform, arousal may be
reduced.
- Treatment changes for other conditions, if
needed to eliminate side effects that decrease arousal.
Treatment for an inability to reach orgasm
A woman
may seek treatment because she has never experienced an
, is experiencing long delays in reaching
orgasm, or has become unable to reach orgasm. Treatment usually begins with
changing any
medicine that is known to affect orgasm. (Talk to your
doctor before you stop any medicine you are taking.)
It is also
important to understand what a normal sexual stimulation phase would be for
that woman. If a woman is experiencing a delay or absence of orgasm after
adequate sexual stimulation, treatment may include:
- Self-stimulation, along with erotic fantasy. If a woman is able to become highly aroused but is unable to have an orgasmic release, the use of a vibrator may help.
- Talking and listening to each other more.
This includes talking openly about sex, what each of you needs, and what you
want to do differently together.
- Learning more about sexual response. For example, it may help to learn that most women find it easier to have an orgasm from direct clitoral stimulation and that most couples do not have orgasms at the same time.
- Decreasing
inhibition with fantasizing, distractions, and/or listening to music.
Treatment for pain during intercourse
Pain during
intercourse often is caused by a physical reason, such as vaginal dryness or
infection. This is why treatment must start with finding out the cause of a sexual problem. If a physical condition is the cause, treatment of
that condition may eliminate the pain. But pain during intercourse may have
more than one cause, including psychological causes such as anxiety or the
memory of sexual assault.1
- Pain that occurs during initial penetration
by the penis may be caused by involuntary contractions of the vagina
(vaginismus). Vaginismus is more common in young, inexperienced women and is
sometimes related to a lack of education or preparedness for sexual
intercourse.3 Treatment may include a program of
progressive muscle relaxation and gradual vaginal dilation, possibly including
psychotherapy. But pain during initial penetration also may be caused by
vaginal irritation or an anatomical condition. If so, getting rid of the pain
will require treating the physical reason.
- Pain that comes from the vestibule, which is the area around the opening of the vagina, may be from localized vulvodynia.
- After
, it is common to have vaginal dryness. This
can cause pain during initial penetration or after intercourse has begun and
the penis is in the vagina. Try using liberal amounts of vaginal lubricant. If
this does not work as well as you need it to, talk to your doctor about
vaginal estrogen, which can reverse vaginal dryness
and sensitivity.
- If the pain is caused by the deep thrusting of the
penis, the cause may be a pelvic disease. But it may also be caused by an
inability to relax. An open and trusting relationship with your doctor will enable you to explore the cause of the pain and decide on a
course of treatment.
Treatment for aging and menopause-related sexual problems
It is common for a woman's sexual desire to decrease
gradually as she ages. In some cases this decrease is caused by the lack of a
partner. But women continue to be sexually interested and to have the
capability for sexual pleasure throughout their lives.1 Hormonal changes may be a cause of decreased sexual function
in older women. During and after menopause, levels of the hormones
,
, and
in a woman's body decline.
- Nonprescription water-based products that
provide vaginal lubrication are available. You can typically find these
products, such as Astroglide and K-Y Jelly, at pharmacies, usually near the
condoms. Vaginal moisturizers, such as Replens, are not for use right before sexual intercourse. But when used regularly, they can help with vaginal dryness and with keeping your vaginal pH normal.
- Vaginal estrogen therapy can reduce vaginal dryness and
irritation and increase the blood flow in the vagina. If you have only vaginal
symptoms (and not
, for example), you can use a low-dose
estrogen cream, ring, or tablet in your vagina. Many
women find that using cream or a tablet twice a week is often enough.
- Systemic estrogen therapy is a high enough dose that it affects
your whole body and can help with several
symptoms. If you have symptoms that affect
your physical and mental well-being, talk to your doctor about the risks and
benefits of taking daily estrogen.
Estrogen therapy can be oral (pills), vaginal, or
transdermal (with a patch). Estrogen therapy may affect sexual desire, arousal,
and enjoyment, as well as the capability to reach an orgasm. But taking daily estrogen without
can cause cancer of the lining of the uterus
(). So a woman who has a
uterus and wishes to take systemic hormones usually takes estrogen in
combination with progestin to protect her uterus. This is called
estrogen-progestin therapy, also known as hormone
replacement therapy.
Testosterone therapy helps some
women who have a low sex drive,
especially those who have had their ovaries removed. Surgery to remove the
ovaries (oophorectomy) causes sudden menopause—testosterone and estrogen, and
sometimes sex drive, suddenly drop. (Normally, testosterone slowly declines
with age.) Some postmenopausal women take testosterone to improve sexual desire
and responsiveness and to increase the frequency of sexual fantasies and
interest.
If you are considering taking testosterone supplements,
talk to your doctor about the potential side effects. Make sure you are
taking the lowest possible dose and are carefully monitored for side effects
while taking testosterone.
What To Think About
Over time, an untreated sexual
problem can increase its impact on your quality of life. As the cause of a
sexual problem creates discomfort and dissatisfaction, sexual activity may
become a tense and unwelcome experience.