For mothers, relaxation as a means of getting in the mood cannot be overemphasized. Begin by de-stressing to reduce fatigue. Then, take it up a notch, and schedule specific sensuality-recharging days.
A libido-boosting day consists of intense relaxation in combination with activities that get sexual thoughts flowing and honor your body as a source of physical pleasure. Many women find that they just don't have the libido on-off switch that their husbands possess, making a slow buildup essential to the process.
If you've hit a brick wall trying to get your husband to take more responsibility caring for the kids, perhaps the magic words will be that he gets the kids next Saturday while you rev your sexual engine. Be playful. But explain that you're experimenting with different approaches, so that you don't feel pressured to perform sexually at the end of the day.
At first, it may take discipline and structure to incorporate active libido boosting into your schedule. Think of this as being like working out -- it never seems like you have the time until you're hooked. Give this approach a try, and stay open to the idea that the benefits only become clear with repetition.
Read This Book: Great Sex for New Moms: Ten Steps to Nurturing Passion While Raising Kids