Should I be concerned that one of my twins seems ahead of the other?

My eight-month-old twin girls were born at 38 weeks. They're healthy and thriving. I'm a little concerned because my firstborn, who's more of an observer, seems a bit behind my secondborn, who's a take-charge type. They're both active; however, my secondborn is standing while her sister is just starting to sit. My firstborn is content bouncing in her bouncer while her sister wants to touch the roof.

Am I overreacting? My husband thinks so. Are there any activities that would make my firstborn stronger? It's difficult with twins because they're always being compared, which I dislike very much. I feel bad for my firstborn because her sister is usually the one to "do it first." It isn't a problem now, but what about when they get older and begin to speak?


Listen to your husband. He is a wise man and a good father.

Even if your daughters are identical twins, they are still individuals. They will develop new skills at their own pace.

“Doing it first” isn't necessarily better. My firstborn (who was separated by three years from my secondborn) regularly conned Number Two into “doing it first” to see the consequences before she tried it. Now, she was a smart kid!

Unfortunately, it's human nature to compare ourselves with others. Siblings are always compared with each other, especially twins. You're a perceptive mom to be alert to this issue. The best defense is to look for the unique talents in each of your children and praise them. Celebrate their differences and your daughters will, too.

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