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Between tearing up a picture of Pope John Paul II on SNL in 1992, becoming an ordained Roman Catholic priest (which the Church does not condone) in the late '90s, and declaring herself a lesbian -- and then backtracking soon after -- in 2000, once-bald Irish rocker Sinead O'Connor used to be a lightning rod for controversy. After a few years lying low, she's back with a vengeance: In a series of seriously X-rated posts on her official site and her Twitter feed, the "Nothing Compares 2 U" singer, now 44, says she's "in desperate need of a very sweet sex-starved man" (guess she was pulling our leg with the whole lesbian thing!) -- and she goes on to describe in sexually graphic detail exactly what she's looking for.
"I know. Its a sin for mothers to talk about sex. Unless its missionary," O'Connor, who has oft railed against the Catholic Church's policies, recently tweeted by way of introduction. "SO VERY VERY happy to be weeny insect chipping away at Ireland's sexual repression."
She then went on to share a very specific list of deal-breakers for what that "sweet sex-starved man" must and must not be like. Many of them -- which deal with the particular kind of sex she likes and are conveniently listed out by New York magazine -- are not appropriate for a family site. The most printable criteria are: "Stubble is a non-negotiable must" and "Must not be named Brian or Nigel."
Things only get weirder from there. "Inanimate objects are starting to look good as are inappropriate and/or unavailable men and/or inappropriate and/or unavailable fruits and vegetables," she writes. "I tell you yams are looking like the winners." Lucky yams!
And Twitter feed has become a running gag of "crude jokes," which she seems to be enjoying immensely. On August 29, she tweeted, "Went 2 doctor. He told me stop wanking. I said "why?". He said "cuz I'm trying to examine u."
In another tweet, O'Connor mock lamented, "Crying now. All alone. Saturday night. Every ugly bitch in the world is gettin' porked but me. : ("
But apparently that's because she's holding out for American comedian Dave Chapelle. "Going (to) bed. Alone," she tweeted on Aug. 27. "Hey u guys in U.S? Dave Chapelle is my dream man. Can u find out if he's single and likes the backdoor?" Alrighty, then!
Despite the racy nature of much of her dialogue, O'Connor has serious criticisms about the way sex is handled in Ireland and is poking fun at some of the more prudish elements of her society. This was evident in an Aug. 27 tweet in which she joked about how her sudden surge in Twitter followers was directly related to one of her references. "867 followers since mentioning anal sex last monday nite!" she wrote. "Shuda mentioned it years ago!"
O'Connor, however, has been sure to tweet that much of what she writes is not true, or is a joke meant to prod at the hypocrisy of those who would criticize her. She takes a breezy tone on her Twitter feed, which makes it one of the most entertaining reads around. For example, she signed off one night with: "I must end now as I have a hot date with a banana."
O'Connor first achieved stardom in the States with her cover of Prince's "Nothing Compares 2 U." Apparently, O'Connor now believes that nothing compares to either Dave Chapelle or a banana. The jury is still out on which one she will choose.