SPAM Walking Shoes: The Latest in Fitness Gear?

Canned mystery meat is rarely associated with healthy living. Yet, you can talk a walk on the ham side in these meat loafers

Anyone whose parents or grandparents grew up poor, like mine, were intimate with SPAM. First made in 1937, this post-war, low-cost meal, dubbed “The Miracle Meat of a  Million Uses” was an instant cupboard staple. This was back when families were more concerned putting any food on the table for the lowest price possible. Now that people are trying to eat healthier (processed, high-sodium meat doesn't usually make the cut), what could SPAM possibly be used for? Shoe stencils of course!

A shoe company based in Venice, Calif. called Sanuk, known for their ultra-casual Sidewalk Surfer loafers, has inked a licensing deal with Hormel Foods to bring SPAM to your shoe rack. (To be clear, the shoes aren't made from SPAM, just decorated with its iconic logo).

Growing up in southern California, I know firsthand (uh, foot?) what constitutes standard, ultra-casual Cali footwear. I vividly remembers Uggs 1.0, Vans, Jellies or Flojos, (which literally translated to “Lazies” in Spanish). So, outside of the oddball beach fashion of southern Calfiornia, why would anyone spend $70 to slip into mystery-meat-themed loafers? Walking = good for your heart. SPAM = bad for your heart. Kitsch = Alive and well.

I shudder to think of what’s next: Wedges with a three-layer cake motif? Snickers sneakers? Sausage sandals? Tortilla flats? (We already have spaghetti straps. Let’s make a meal!) Though for the record, I would buy some Jon Hamm’s John Ham any day. Rwar.

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