We open this week with Betty lying down on the floor of Gio's deli, glass shattered all around her, unconscious, and in handcuffs?! What happened? Flashback, 3 days earlier...
Wil and Marc totally play out the pity party act, asking Christina to carry the child for her because she is unable to *sniff sniff*. "Bono and Sheryl Crow should do a charity concert for her lady parts" an upset Marc comments. Of course, Christina has no idea that Wil's egg was sperminated by a dead Bradford Meade. "In my womb?!" an appalled Christina replies to the request to which Marc responds "Well we would ask for your purse, but we don't want a baby that grew in a Gucci knock-off" . Wil lies and says that the baby was conceived by an anonymous donor and that they will offer her a grand sum of $100,000 (which coincidentally matches up with the amount of Stuart's medical expenses). Disgusted, Christina tells them that her uterus is closed to devil spawn. Good for you Christina!
How is she financing her husband’s expenses then? Only in the offices of Mode can you find a vintage couture dress Jackie O wore to dinner at the White House- worth a hundred thousand grand. But Marc overhears Christina’s genius plan and we all know he is up to no good…
When randos take over Fey’s not-so-secret sex room, Amanda flips out and removes Fey’s belongings. On the back of the painting she removed from the room, she discovered secret pages of Fey’s diary!
In the midst of her murder trial, Claire Meade reminisces about the special perfume that Bradford gave her. Since she’s not allowed to keep it, she asks Betty to hang on to it for her.
We go back to Amanda who is now reading excerpts from the diary. It is revealed that Fey was on vacation with Bradford and told him to bring Claire back the perfume. What Bradford didn’t know was, that she changed the ingredients in it and made it toxic! It would slowly seep into her brain and lead to death!! Just as Amanda discovers this, Betty spritzes a generous amount onto her neck…
All of a sudden Betty’s energy level is ten times that of what Red Bull can give you, and her scent has caught the attention of Henry. When Gio comes by to drop off sandwiches, Betty is behaving even more erratically, almost like she is in a trance! “These tomatoes taste like…sunshine!” When Henry leaves for Tussah, a wild Betty jumps Henry and begins a passionate make-out session in the elevator.
All was going well at the trial, but when Daniel is asked to break a 20 at the coffee shop, it just so happens that the person who needed the change was the judge for Claire’s case! The perfect photo op for the pap to accuse Daniel of bribing the judge, and that’s where their good luck ends.
Amanda asks Marc to burn the pages of the diary, out of spite because Claire killed her mother (even though Fey poisoned Claire). The pages of the diary could totally exonerate Claire, but Amanda cares more for the reputation of her dead mother.
When Christina moves forward with selling the dress to a potential buyer, the dress is completely tattered and spray painted (courtesy of Wil and Marc)! She has no choice but to accept Wil’s offer. Betty experiences a panic attack when Henry doesn’t call, and goes on a crazy rampage. She takes it all out on Gio, and sprays even more perfume driving her deeper into insanity! She writes an angry note to Gio about how much she hates him, and goes down to his deli to give him the note. When no one answers to her (since the store is closed), she throws a trash can through the window out of frustration. And that, is how she ended up at Gio’s deli. At the doc’s office, her medical reports show high levels of toxins in her body, which has lead to hallucinations, paranoia, and could be fatal. Betty realizes that this was all the perfume’s doing, and finds that Amanda has stolen the bottle from her desk. When confronted by Betty, she admits that Fey poisoned Claire and reveals to Betty that it was even mentioned in her diary. After Betty’s brief heart-to-heart with Mandy, she shows up at court with the new evidence. But it seems that she was tricked- because the bottle was filled with nothing but water. The new judge, Nancy Beyotch (very fitting name) was definitely not pleased.
Mandy asks Marc to destroy all the evidence for her but wait- Marc has a conscience! And morals! Hey, just cause the guy works for Wil doesn’t mean that he commits criminal acts and at least they advance his career. He knocks some sense into Mandy and tells her that Claire Meade is innocent, and she doesn’t have to pay because she really didn’t do anything wrong. Just when the trial was headed nowhere, Amanda shows up with the real toxic perfume, and the diary pages that Marc didn’t burn.
The final verdict: NOT GUILTY BY REASON OF TEMPORARY INSANITY. Claire Meade is a free woman!!
What will happen when the new ‘heir’ of Mode Christina is carrying is born? And I can’t help but wonder if there will be a possible storyline between Gio and Betty… who could miss the loving looks he threw at Betty all episode long?!