When I was younger, I used to buy my mom makeup for Hannukah. I remember one December in particular, my dad drove me to this emporium-type cosmetic store called The World of Make-up, or something like that, where I tossed items like liquid eyeliner, violet mascara and plum lipstick into my basket. Later, my mom opened the dreidle-wrapped packages and cried out in delight. I had bought her, she proclaimed, the perfect present.
The only problem: She was lying. My mom hardly wore makeup, and the small amount she did wear was far more tasteful than the electric cobalt blue mascara I'd foisted on her.
So why, then, did I fill her Hannukah Harry stocking with cosmetics?
It's simple: I wanted it.
That's right. Even though I received the boom box and New Kids on the Block cassette tapes and Hello Kitty diary that she knew I wanted, this selfish nine-year-old bought her the gifts that keep on giving... back to me.
Now older and wiser (I haven't rocked cobalt blue mascara for, like, at least eight months), I realize the whole point of the holidays, no matter what your religion, is to put a smile on the recipient's face, not your own. And yet, for some of us, the end of the year still trips a switch in our mind that makes us think, "You know, my sister doesn't really want that cashmere sweater from Ann Taylor Loft. What she needs is three sessions with a personal trainer" or "It seems like Aunt Laura's really been having a hard time sticking to her Weight Watcher's plan. Maybe she'd like a gently used elliptical from Play It Again Sports."
Yes, it's The Helpful Gift.
There's nothing wrong with showing the people you love that you care about them and want them to be healthy. But much like no woman wants to receive a Dust Buster from her husband on their fifth anniversary, no one likes getting sports bras and gift certificates to salad-specializing cafes like Pockets if they're not at all into working out or eating healthy.
I totally get the notion of wanting to gently nudge a loved one in what you think is the right direction. But the fact is, people don't change until they're ready. Buying a couch potato a cute workout tee probably isn't going to be any more successful than buying a hardcore smoker a month-long batch of Nicoderm patches. Now, if that smoker was on the tobacco wagon, then I'm definitely behind the gift. If your dad is, say, just starting back at the gym after a heart attack and eager to get moving, then a session with a trainer could be a great idea. But if your favorite coworker calls you Scary Stairmaster Sally every time you head out for a noon workout, then I'm afraid your Secret Santa padded spin shorts aren't going to be terribly appreciated.
How about you? Have you ever tried to give family members healthy gifts like workout apparel, fruit baskets, etc, instead of a box of chocolates? How did it turn out? Were they thankful or insulted? Or have you yourself been on the receiving end of a yoga mat when all you'd asked for was a gift certificate to the Cheesecake Factory?
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