Who Needs Tweezers When You Can Get Eyebrow Transplants and Some Pokertox?

The latest (and weirdest) procedures to join the plastic surgery family are...

So, it turns out that eyebrow transplants are the new hotness. I know, I thought the same thing, but this is real. If you’re looking for some plastic surgery that’s a little out of the ordinary, here are some options for your next elective surgery:

Eyebrow Transplants 

When a tweezer and pencil just won’t get it done, you can go under the knife, pay thousands of dollars and get those Brooke Shields Brows you’ve always wanted. You’re not only the eyebrow transplant president, you’re also a client.

Toe Shortening 

Women who compete in the Latin Dances purposefully push their toes out of the front of their shoes for better toe point. For everyone else, there’s toe shortening. Finally the shorter toes you’ve always wanted at only $2,000 per toe.

Belly Button Surgery 

Have you always wished for the perfect innie, but thought you were eternally stuck with an outie? No problem. A quick umbilicoplasty (and liposuction, laser hair removal, tanning, anal bleaching, a mani-pedi, and whatever else they are peddling this year) and you’ll be ready for bikini season.

Pokertox

Do you struggle to stay stoic during your weekly penny poker game? hop over to your friendly neighborhood plastic surgeon and get a “pokertox” treatment and you’ll tell no more. Go home with a neurotoxin injected near your eyes and only pennies in your pocket.

Designer Vagina 

The ultimate triumph in profiting by making women insecure about things that are completely normal, after a quick surgery and a painful recovery time (we’re guessing sitting is off the table for a while) and you can have some surgically enhanced lady bits.

 

Of course each of us is the boss of our own body and we are allowed to get plastic surgery. Still, maybe it’s worth asking why we’re willing to put our health, eyebrows, and vaginas on the line to get a little closer to an unattainable standard of beauty.

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