Why do people think I'm so boring?

Some people at work say that I'm boring because I hardly go out on weekends. The thing is, I don't have friends that like to go out often, and I find it uncomfortable going out by myself. Now that I am working I have co-workers who like to go out on weekends but they don't invite me. They just ask me "How come you don't go out on weekends?" These co-workers are in their late thirties -- but please, I'm 28! Does that make me too young to socialize with them? I don't think so, but I cannot push them to invite me to join them whenever they go out. --ana2

Question:

Dear ana2,

I'm hearing a lot of blaming others from your message. Perhaps it's a good idea to take a different approach. What about taking responsibility for yourself?

First of all, nobody has the right to dictate how you should spend your free time. You have nothing for which to apologize. However, you do seem to resent not having weekend activities. Every newspaper's weekend section has a calendar of events. Loads of activities are listed -- find one that interests you. Force yourself to pick something and go. Eventually you will find something to your liking, and thus meet others who share the same interests.

And if you want to join the group from work, say so! Perhaps they think you aren't interested in going out with them. Just say, "Mind if I join you on Friday night?" Or what about inviting one of them to lunch or to see a movie sometime? You'll never know unless you try!

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