Your high need baby: Seven ways to cope

7. Unresponsive to Standard Parenting Solutions:

"I can definitely relate to those of you who have had mothers of "easy" babies try to give advice -- Isn't it annoying? 'Have you tried walking him? Have you tried carrying him like this? Have you tried the swing?' Duh?!?! Of course I have! Even though they are just trying to help they really don't understand, do they?" -- iVillager jane211

"I'm so sick of people telling me all the other theories on why my son cries all the time --that my seven-week-old son must have a tummy ache, or is hurting. When I tell them he is just a fussy baby or 'high need' they all look at me like I'm crazy or like there is no such thing. They think that I am doing something wrong. It's getting on my nerves!" -- iVillager dawsonsmommy

What Do the Experts Say?

Not surprisingly, many of our members' comments are in keeping with expert opinion on the subject of high need babies. Dr. Bill and Martha Sears, authors of Parenting the Fussy Baby and the High-Need Child : Everything You Need to Know - From Birth to Age Five, write that high need babies fit the following distinct profile:

1. Intense
2. Hyperactive
3. Draining
4. Feeds Frequently
5. Demanding
6. Awakens Frequently
7. Unsatisfied
8. Unpredictable
9. Supersensitive
10. Crave Touch or Uncuddly
11. Not Self-Soothing
12. Separation Sensitive

On a positive note, the Sears say that despite the fact that high need babies can be a handful for the first few years, they do grow up to be secure, mature and well adjusted young adults. They may even grow up to be more intelligent than "normal" babies, state the Sears, who successfully raised two high need children within their own household.

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